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Learning to die is learning to live !
2024 July 6th
I am Ingrid. I am born because I was needed. I did great for about 3 years, and then emotions and box mechanisms took over. When I was 30 years old, I lost for the first time my singing voice. Not a good thing for a professional singer. The loss of my voice set me back on track, to the path of consciousness. First through the encounter of a seer, later through non-violent communication, the Work of Byron Katie and then Possibility Management. Almost 2 years ago, I had the first slight symptoms of a disease called , bulbar form of amyotrophic lateral sclerosis ALS. I lost my voice again, this time my speaking voice. I was ready for this disease , in the sense that I didn’t put any story on it. This disease exists in the world. Why it should not happen to me? I am back on track. I am what is needed. I live full out. I love my life, every single second of it. |
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You are born because you were needed. You lost track, like everybody else, in your childhood, through one or several traumatic experiences or because you learned beIng adaptive. There is nothing wrong to loose track. The important thing is to get back on track without reproaching yourself anything, in other words, without falling into parent voice mode.
This is called Decontamination. Other words are Clarity or Path of Enlightenment or Wisdom or Personal Growth. Possibility Management offers Decontamination with a capital D. I did 14 months of daily practice of Decontamination, 10 to 30 minutes. I started this practice 6 months before my first tiny little symptoms, and one year before the diagnosis of a disease called ALS (amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, bulbar form). This practice allowed me to have no resistance at all, neither for the symptoms, nor for the diagnosis. I stopped the practice two months after the diagnosis because I felt I have integrated to live (most of the time) in non resistance. |
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Usually when we encounter things we don’t like, for example nasty problems and difficulties or “bad news”, we develop resistance in one or more of our five bodies. Due to our past, we repeat old patterns in situations which need our full creative potential. I was lucky enough to have friends with their swords out to tell me when I was in victim mode. Before, I didn’t even know that I was in victim mode. I thought I was right.
That was three years before I was diagnosed. In this short amount of time, I have changed from a complaineress (about my husband) to a creatoress, and from an adaptive life in a box to a person who lives full out. If I can do it, you can do it too. Decontamination is one way. There are many others. If Decontamination resonates with you, you might find the video I did after one year of daily practice, and 4 days after the diagnosis helpful. |
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What else has changed? I discovered that not doubting myself is a decision, one of many harvests of Decontamination. Doubting yourself is listening to bullshit. I decided to not doubt myself, not a single second. One year after the diagnosis, I had some really tough weeks when I lost “my” last spots of autonomy. I learned that “my” physical body is not mine. It belongs to Life. I have to give up any idea of “my” or “mine”. ALS is considered a disease without pain, but I had severe pain due to spasticity. I developed the reflex to be in a Here and Now of 3 seconds in the moment I feel pain or discomfort. And it works for emotional “discomfort” too, like fear, anger and sadness. |
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Over the time, not only my speech slowed down, before I lost it completely, everything is slowing down. I love it. Slowness makes room for the comedy of Life. I have never laughed as much as I do now. Together with my caregivers, we discover how hilarious life is, for example when I get a Salvador Dali moustache from my smoothie while eating. Such simple things take on a different dimension through slowness. It is the pace of Love. Life is not a drama, but a comedy.
I live in Love and Joy. That is what Life wants for you too. If I can do it, you can do it too. |
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